


Spider-Man: The Girl Next Door

by d0d0bird



Series: Marvel: Tales to Tantalize! [5]
Category: Jessica Jones (TV), Marvel, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Angst and Humor, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Beating, Big Sister Jessica Jones, Bully Flash Thompson, Bullying, College Student Peter Parker, Declarations Of Love, Drunkenness, Embarrassed Peter Parker, Embarrassment, F/M, Falling In Love, Flash Thompson Being A Jerk, Flash Thompson Bullies Peter Parker, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Friends to Lovers, Gen, Get Together, Humiliation, Hurt Peter Parker, Insecure Peter Parker, Its Not a Literal Adoption But Still, Jessica Jones Adopts Peter Parker, Jessica Jones is a Good Bro, Light Angst, Love Confessions, Messy, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Noogie - Freeform, Noogies, Oblivious Peter Parker, POV Peter Parker, Past Felicia Hardy/Peter Parker - Freeform, Peter Parker & Jessica Jones friendship, Peter Parker Actually Treats Mary Jane Like a Human Being, Peter Parker Gets a Hug, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Peter Parker is a Mess, Peter Parker-centric, Poor Peter Parker, Precious Peter Parker, Protective Jessica Jones, Public Humiliation, Rejection, Ridicule, Romantic Friendship, Second-Hand Embarrassment, Shoved Into Trash, Situational Humiliation, Social Humiliation, Some Humor, Suspension, Teasing, Verbal Abuse, Verbal Humiliation, wedgie, wedgies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-13
Updated: 2019-10-13
Packaged: 2020-12-14 15:09:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21017798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/d0d0bird/pseuds/d0d0bird
Summary: Peter Parker has been having a bad time. He's been betrayed by Black Cat, publicly defeated by Mysterio, rejected by Liz Allan, and routinely humiliated by Flash Thompson. He is feeling lowlier and more pathetic than he ever has in his life.And that's when MJ showed up





	Spider-Man: The Girl Next Door

Patrons milled about through the lobby. Clerks rotely went about their jobs helping customers withdraw this, deposit that, and futilely trying to explain the bank’s horrendous phone application. Attention soon fell on the front doors as fog covered the other side of the glass. None of the patrons had time to comment or react before the doors burst open, flooding white fog into the lobby.

“Geeheeheehee!” laughed a tall figure as it strode in with the fog.

The figure was dressed entirely in bright green accompanied by a long, purple cape. The figure’s head was obscured by some sort of orb of light that flickered in the frequency of the figure’s voice.

“This is a robbery!” the figure announced, his high-pitched voice echoing across the room as if on a sound system, “Do not resist, for you are now in the presence of the great Mysterio!”

Everyone stared back at the figure. He held no weapon, was accompanied by no backup, and even now his fog was fading and quickly removing any sense of mystique to his appearance. The silence continued one second too long for Mysterio.

“I said,” he repeated, “This is a robbery!!!”

This time his announcement was accompanied by a pillar of flames erupting either ends of the lobby, nearly burning several patrons who leapt back in fear. Many fell to their knees and lifted their hands into the air. Mysterio cackled with delight.

“Geeheeheehee!” his voice echoed, “That’s more like it! Now, as for my withdrawal…”

“Oh wow,” said Spider-Man, “You bad guys really are running out of ideas, huh?”

“You!” shouted Mysterio, spinning around with flare.

Spider-Man stood at the entrance, casually leaning against the doorway.

“I’m sorry,” said Spider-Man shaking his head, “You’re gonna HAVE to take the fishbowl off if we’re gonna do this.”

“Well, if it isn’t the itsy bitsy spider!”

“Alright sir,” said Spider-Man, “You’re clearly unwell. Just turn yourself in and-”

“On the contrary,” declared Mysterio, pointing his finger right in Spider-Man’s face, “I think you’ll find that I’m VERY well.”

“You really need to work on your-”

Spider-Man tensed as a tingle ran from the top of his head down his spine. His spider sense was warning him. He made a fist and readied his punch. Then he hesitated.

_Wait,_ he thought, _What if this is what he wants? What if I’m falling for a trick?_

That moment of hesitation proved to be a mistake. A white gas sprayed out of the tip of Mysterio’s finger, engulfing Spider-Man’s face in a white cloud. Spider-Man coughed as he realized that he had inhaled a lungful of it without thinking. He felt a slight buzz in his head. It wasn’t his spider sense this time. In fact, it was almost euphoric. That’s when the dizziness set in. The room seemed to tilt back and forth as Spider-Man stumbled back and caught himself on the wall, holding in a burp as he felt is stomach stir.

_What the heck did he hit me with?_

“I see you are becoming familiar with my intoxication gas!” declared Mysterio proudly, “Good luck fighting me with all the coordination of a drunken sailor!”

“Oh yeah...?” said Spider-Man, realizing as he spoke that he was slurring his words, “We’ll see about that...”

Spider-Man swung his fist, but the momentum of his enormous strength was too much to handle in his current state. He fell forward onto his face as Mysterio effortlessly sidestepped his attack.

“Geeheeheehee!” laughed Mysterio, “What’s the matter, Spider-Man? Can’t hold your liquor?”

“Your laugh is… stupid,” murmured Spider-Man between hiccups as he wobbled back to his feet.

“I guess the rumors really are true!” Mysterio mused, “You’re actually quite the pushover!”

“Shut up!!” snapped Spider-Man angrily.

His blood pumping with adrenaline and his head filled with frustration, Spider-Man leapt at Mysterio to tackle him with all his strength. He launched himself forward at superhuman speeds, completely missing Mysterio and crashing through the large windows at the front of the bank, and continuing all the way across the street and slamming into the side of a parked car.

“Wow,” said a nearby pedestrian.

“That looked like it hurt,” said another.

Spider-Man gripped the side of the car and pulled himself back up. He wasn’t in pain even though he had hit the car HARD. Either the adrenaline or the gas was numbing the feeling for the moment. He strained to balance and tried to remember what he was doing.

_Right,_ he realized, _Fish bowl head guy._

Spider-Man ran back towards the bank best he could. He found himself stumbling from wall to wall trying to keep himself upright. Whatever that gas was, the effects were getting more severe by the second. He made it to the vault in time to see Mysterio making a grandiose pose amongst all the cash.

_I could take him out with one punch,_ thought Spider-Man, _but I hit him too hard the impact could break his neck or worse…_

“Well you have made for quite the amusing opponent, Spider-Man,” taunted Mysterio, “Unfortunately, your pathetic tricks were no match for the genius of MYSTERIO!!!”

Mysterio threw his cape as he spun in a circle, becoming shrouded in fog. Spider-Man haphazardly fired a web into the cloud. When the fog cleared, he could see that both Mysterio and the cash were gone. His web had harmlessly stuck to the back of the vault.

“Where’d he go!?!” yelled out Spider-Man, completely confounded.

He turned and ran to the lobby, yelling the same question again to everyone there.

“Wheredego!?” he slurred.

“We thought he was back there with you,” said a clerk.

“Hey Spidey, you need to take a minute or something?” said another.

Spider-Man angrily grunted and continued his pursuit outside. It had to be some sort of trick. There was no way that weirdo had gotten the best of him. Spider-Man looked down the street in either direction, desperately hoping for some sign of Mysterio. The sudden motions of looking back and forth started to get to him, the world swirling as he struggled to parse out individuals from the crowd.

He had to do something. He couldn’t let this joke of a villain beat him. Even if he didn’t know what the next step was, he had to do _something_. Acting mostly on instinct, Spider-Man fired a web high up onto a nearby building. He leapt into the air, tightened his grip on the web, and swung.

Apparently he hadn’t fired the web as high as he thought. His swing on the web immediately veered off course and he found himself spinning while desperately clinging to the web with all of his strength. The next thing he knew, he was colliding directly into a pair of freshly put out trash cans. The webslinger groaned as he lay in the gutter, covered in rotten food and other garbage. He listened to the sound of one of the cans rolling away. That was the last thing he remembered before blacking out.

***

“Nghnhnhnhn…” groaned Peter as he blinked his eyes open.

He was in a dark room. His head throbbed, his body ached, and his stomach churned. Every motion seemed to take an inordinate amount of effort. He was still wearing his costume, but his mask was missing. He panicked, looking around to see if he knew where he was. He couldn’t see much at first, but he could tell he was in some sort of bed. As his eyes adjusted he could tell he was in an apartment of some sort. The smell was familiar.

“You’re awake,” said Jessica.

Peter relaxed at the sound of the familiar voice, even though it was curt. His vision was starting to return. Jessica came into view. She had walked in from around the corner and was now standing at the foot of her bed with her arms crossed. She was only partially dressed, wearing only her jeans and a camisole. Peter finally realized that he was in her apartment.

“How did-” began Peter, before jolting up in bed, “Mysterio! The bank! I have to… I have to…”

He regretted the jolt almost immediately. His dizziness returned and his stomach swelled from the sudden motion. He gripped the sides of the bed to steady himself, taking in a deep breath before resting his face in his hands.

“What happened?” he asked weakly.

“From what I can tell,” said Jessica, walking back around the corner to the kitchen, “That guy with the glowing head drugged you. You were basically drunk.”

“Right,” remembered Peter.

Jessica returned with a glass of water, which she placed on the nightstand next to Peter along with several painkillers and a multivitamin.

“Take this,” she said.

“Criminy,” groaned Peter after finishing the glass, wincing at his still throbbing head, “Is this how you feel EVERY morning?”

“Rude,” said Jessica as she took the empty glass back to the kitchen, “But yeah, basically.”

“How did I get here?”

“I brought you here. Don’t worry, no one saw your face or anything.”

“How did you know to come get me?”

“I saw one of the videos. Luckily I got to you before the cops or something.”

“Videos?”

“Oh, right. Are you ready for this?” asked Jessica with concern.

“...what?” asked Peter in fear.

Jessica pulled out her phone, tapped the screen a few times, and handed it to Peter. Peter looked at the phone and saw a Twitter feed. The Daily Bugle’s account had shared a number of videos. Against his better judgment, Peter pressed play on the first one. Then the next one and the next one. They all consisted of various phone recordings of Spider-Man’s fight against Mysterio. Peter bit his lip with embarrassment as he watched his costumed self stumble, babble, and fall over repeatedly. One video ended in Jessica lifting Spider-Man’s unconscious body out of a pile of trash and leaping off. The various videos had each gone viral in their own right, with countless trending hashtags at Spider-Man’s expense.

“Great,” groaned Peter, “Now Spider-Man is just as much of a loser as Peter Parker.”

Jessica took her phone back and returned to the kitchen, bringing back another glass of water. She put it next to Peter on the nightstand. She watched him look sadly at his lap, ignoring the water. This was hard to watch. She took a deep breath and sat on the side of the bed beside him. 

“What happened?” she asked, “Normally that freaky sixth sense of yours stops these creeps from getting the better of you.”

“I guess I hesitated,” shrugged Peter, “I was ready to take him out, but I suddenly found myself asking if it was a trick, if I was making a mistake, if I was going to get duped. That’s when he got me...”

“Black Cat really took a toll on your confidence, huh?*” asked Jessica quietly.

*Depicted in [Jessica Jones and Spider-Man: Crossed Your Path](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20910803)

“Call me out why don’t you,” frowned Peter.

The two sat in silence for a few moments as Jessica thought about what to say next.

“How’s school?”

“What?”

“I said ‘How’s school?’”

“Doesn’t matter.”

“I disagree.”

“Why’s that?”

“You can’t let Spider-Man be your whole life,” she said, “You have to take care of Peter Parker too.”

“Right, because Peter Parker _really_ has a lot going for him.”

“Shut up,” said Jessica impatiently, “If that’s really true, then talk about it like an adult. It might do you some good to take your mind off supervillains for a moment.”

Peter almost retorted with another quip, but thought better of it. She was right. He wouldn’t be able to fight crime at all if his personal life fell apart. 

“So,” said Jessica, “How’s school?”

“Alright I guess,” shrugged Peter, “Classes are still pretty cool, at least the science ones. I’m still on track to graduate and everything.”

“That’s good,” nodded Jessica, “How about Flash and them, still giving you trouble?”

“Not so much actually,” said Peter, “Liz broke up with Flash last week so he hasn’t been his usual chest-thumping self.”

“Must be good to have a break from that.”

“It is. Also…”

Peter stared at the wall for a moment, pondering.

“What is it?”

“Nothing.”

“Not to play this card, kid,” said Jessica, again impatient, “but I did just save your fucking life. Out with it.”

“Also it’s…” began Peter bashfully, “kind of exciting that Liz is single again.”

“Oh,” realized Jessica in surprise, “You like her?”

“I mean, kinda.”

“Wasn’t she the one who told Flash to hook your underwear to a tree?”

Peter gripped the covers and shifted around, unable to hide his embarrassment.

“You know what?” smirked Jessica, “Go for it.”

“What?”

“Go for it,” she repeated, “Ask her out.”

“What if she says no?”

“She probably will.”

“Thanks…”

“But I think you’ll feel good about asking,” said Jessica, “I’d say she doesn’t deserve you anyway, but that’s for you to decide.”

Peter nodded quietly. Jessica might have been right. The thought of dating Liz, to have her smile at him when he smiled at her… It was such a nice thought. Maybe it was worth the risk.

“Get the rest you need, but let me know if you have to stay here past 9:00,” said Jessica, walking back into the main room, “I want to know ahead of time if you’re still going to be here or if I can actually get laid tonight.”

***

Peter gripped his backpack straps with both hands and looked down at his anxiously tapping foot. The next class period started any minute, so Worthington Hall was packed with students going to class. Peter had class in a moment too, but he had seen Liz here around this time before and thought this might be his chance. The crowd slowly began to thin as students walked into their classes. Peter’s would start soon too, but he did one last glance around the hall for Liz. 

“Liz!” he found himself shouting as he made eye contact with her.

She spun her head and looked right at him. She had an intense look that made Peter’s heart race every time they locked eyes. It was a serious look, sizing up whomever she was looking at. Today Liz was wearing a loose white blouse, blue skinny jeans, and knee-high black boots. Like all her outfits, it was extremely flattering on her. Peter ignored his instincts to stare, trying to be as self-aware and collected as possible.

“Parker,” she said, “What is it?”

“I, uh…” began Peter as the hall slowly emptied out, “I wanted to talk to you real quick.”

“Fine,” she agreed, “Real quick. I have class.”

“Really? That’s crazy. Me too!”

“What is it, Parker?” she asked impatiently.

_Idiot!_, Peter thought to himself, _You’re already screwing this up!_

“I... heard about you and Flash,” said Peter, “I’m… Uh… Sorry you two didn’t work out.”

“Okay…” said Liz, visibly annoyed, “Is that all?”

“No,” struggled Peter, feeling sweat form all over his body as he trembled with nervousness, “I wanted to ask you… something else.”

“You’re not asking me out, are you?”

“Um…”

“Please tell me you’re not asking me out.”

“No,” stammered Peter, “No, of course I wouldn’t do that.”

“Oh thank God,” she sighed with relief, “Then what is it? What did you want to ask me?”

“Um…” began Peter, still trembling, “What... is… up?”

“...stop talking to me.”

“Okay,” sighed Peter as she walked away.

That certainly hadn’t gone as planned. Peter hadn’t realized how little she thought of him until that moment. What was he thinking?

“PARKER!!!” roared a voice from behind.

“Oh God no,” realized Peter.

He turned around to see Flash stomping toward him. He towered about one head taller than Peter and his shoulder width was practically double what Peter’s was. His body was built of solid muscle. As always, he wore his letterman jacket.

“You must think you’re really something, huh?” he boomed, backing Peter into a wall, “Moving in on my girl like that?!”

“She’s not your girl, Flash,” Peter found himself saying without thinking.

Peter partially regretted that. He watched Flash’s eyes bulge with anger. Peter closed his eyes and accepted his fate as Flash grabbed the front of the collar of his hoodie, lifted him up, and slammed him into the wall with enough force to knock the wind out of him.

“Watch your goddamn mouth, Parker!” shouted Flash, bringing his face so close to Peter’s that he could smell his breath.

“Don’t worry,” coughed Peter, “She doesn’t have any interest in me anyway.”

“Sounds like you’re finally learning your place,” said Flash with satisfaction, “but just to be sure…”

Flash removed the lid from a garbage can beside him. Peter groaned in anticipation as Flash tightened his grip on him Peter, lifted him again, and shoved him ass-first into the trash can. Peter let out a grunt as his body lodged into the opening, arms and legs sticking straight up in a ridiculous fashion. Peter heard a snicker. The hall wasn’t empty. He noticed a group of kids across the room watching. They were enjoying this almost as much as Flash. They weren’t going to do anything to help Peter. He had learned that much by now.

Peter’s attention was brought back to Flash as the jock placed both hands on Peter’s shoulders and shoved him deeper into the trash can. Peter yelped as he felt his butt press into something warm and wet, soaking through to his underwear. Flash continued to laugh as he crammed Peter’s arms and legs painfully into the can with him.

“Come on, Flash!” whined Peter, “I have to get to class!”

This earned more laughter from the onlookers. Peter blushed with indignance as Flash shoved him down one final time before pressing the lid tightly on top of the can, trapping Peter in the wet and smelly prison. He heard the distant laughter of Flash walking away. Peter sighed in defeat. He should have known that asking Liz out would be a bad idea. Maybe Jessica had a point though: at least he tried. 

Now he had to focus on getting out of this situation without revealing his powers to any witnesses. Even though he could easily bust out of the can with his super strength, he couldn’t let himself be seen doing that. So he tried a different tactic. He grunted quietly as he shifted around in the can, rocking back and forth. The can itself began to move with him, first shimmying back and forth, then rocking along with him until it started to lose balance. Peter heard a woman’s voice say “What the hell?” just before the can fell completely over and Peter was spilled out onto the floor along with the trash.

“Peter?!?” asked the woman’s voice in alarm, “Peter Parker!?!”

“MJ!?!” blurted Peter out in response, “What are you doing here?!”

Mary Jane Watson: Peter’s childhood neighbor, first crush, and once upon a time his best friend. They had grown up playing together and spent nearly all their time together in high school. He had even joined his school’s stage crew so he could work in the drama department with her. He saw every performance she was ever in and he thought about asking her out countless times. Watching her perform though, all he could think about was how amazing she was and how she deserved someone better than him. Then came graduation. Then they began to lose touch. Then Peter became Spider-Man and, well, suddenly time for Mary Jane was no longer an option.

Standing before him now, Mary Jane looked very much like Peter had remembered her. She was sort of lanky like he was, though her body looked more toned than scrawny. She was as stylish as she always had been, complimenting her bright green eyes and red hair with a green T-shirt, matching Converse, and a white and green belt in her blue skinny jeans. She wore that confident smile of hers that always made Peter feel like she could take on the world. He had missed that smile. 

“What am _I_ doing here?” she repeated back to him, “What are _you_ doing inside a trash can?”

“Sorry,” shrugged Peter as he stood up, brushing off what he could, “If I had known you’d be here I would’ve brought you one too.”

Mary Jane let out a snort of a laugh. Peter smiled. He was always proud of his ability to make her do that. Sometimes it seemed like she was the only one who found him funny. Sometimes that was all he needed, though.

“Flash again?” she asked.

“Yeah.”

“What an ass.”

Peter smiled. It felt nice to hear someone say that, especially her.

“So wait,” said Peter, “Are you enrolled here now?”

“I am!” she smiled.

“How?!” asked Peter excitedly, before adding, “I mean, if you don’t mind telling me.”

“Do you remember that Williams Scholarship I applied for senior year?” she asked, “The one where I bombed the audition?”

“You’re kidding! You got it this year!?”

“Yup! Third time’s the charm!”

“Congrats!” shouted Peter, opening his arms for a hug.

Mary Jane hugged him back as they both laughed. Peter was hit by a nostalgic mix of joy and melancholy. He leaned back out of the hug as he felt the familiar squeeze around his shoulders. Mary Jane always ended their hugs with a shoulder squeeze. Peter loved it. It always reassured him that her fondness of him was genuine. He didn’t realize how much he had missed that feeling until that moment.

“Oh God,” she realized as she looked at her watch, “I’m late for class. Shoot, where is it...?”

“What’s the class?”

“It’s a gen ed class,” she said, trying to remember, “A lit one...”

“Introduction to Shakespeare?”

“Yeah!”

“I’m in it too!” smiled Peter, “Here, follow me.”

“Um,” said Mary Jane carefully as Peter turned to lead her to the class, “Peter, you have something on your pants…”

“Yeah,” sighed Peter, “I’m pretty sure that trash can was filled with mostly cheese fries.”

***

Peter was never a theater kid per say, but he spent most of his time in high school in the drama department because of Mary Jane. He had developed a fondness for theater; it usually brought back good memories for him. So when the time came to pick a gen ed for lit, the Shakespeare course seemed like the obvious move.

It was the wrong one. This class was taught by the unbelievably dull Professor Schustrap. He seemed to like Shakespeare well enough, but that was more than drowned out for his unending devotion to strict interpretation. He was a joyless man who was far more interested in one’s ability to memorize as many sonnets as possible than he was in the themes, characters, or stories of what he taught. It was like having a driving instructor who constantly tried to teach you how to memorize automobile blueprints.

Mary Jane seemed to share Peter’s opinion of the class. Her head was face down on her desk, all but audibly groaning at the meaningless droll of the lecture. The hall was smaller than most, but still sizable with over 50 students lining the many rows of desks. Peter and Mary Jane were sat up at the back. They had been there for all of 30 minutes and already it seemed clear that everyone wanted to leave.

“...and that’s why,” continued Schustrap, “it is far more powerful to keep the play as it is than to make any changes. Taming of the Shrew may be controversial, but I think we can all agree that it’s best performed as is: warts and all.”

“Yeah,” whispered Peter, “After all, when I find out that I have a wart, my first thought is ‘I want to keep this!’”

Mary Jane let out her snort laugh, lifting her head up and covering her mouth as she grinned at Peter. He smiled back.

“Ms. Watson,” announced Schustrap loudly, “Do you have something to share?”

“That was me, Professor,” said Peter before Mary Jane could respond, “Sorry about that. I just made a stupid joke. It won’t happen again.”

“Oh really, Mr. Parker?” asked Schustrap confidently, “A joke, you say? Well let us hear it.”

Peter swallowed nervously. The whole hall had now turned to look at him, awaiting his response. He felt sweat start to form on his back as his legs began to tremble under the desk.

“No,” he muttered nervously, “It really wasn’t-”

“I for one would really like to hear it,” said Schustrap emphatically, “Please. Go on.”

“Um,” fumbled Peter, beginning to panic as more and more eyes fell on him, “...why did the chicken cross the road?”

Silence. No response. Not one hint of laughter.

“Loser,” coughed one student quietly.

“Mr. Parker,” said Schustrap, “Please see me after class.”

“Yes, Professor...”

***

“That was a bold move, Tiger,” smiled Mary Jane as Peter stepped out of the classroom.

“You waited for me,” realized Peter in surprise, “Thanks!”

“What did Schustrap say?”

“He wants me to compile a list of every major production of Shrew,” said Peter, “and discuss how they have -and I quote- ‘Twisted the intentions of the bard.’”

Mary Jane made a mock vomiting sound.

“I know.”

“That was funny what you said,” added Mary Jane as they began to walk, “About his wart comment. You could have owned it, you know. People would have laughed.”

“Yeah, right.”

“They would have!” insisted Mary Jane, “You’re funny, Peter.”

Peter shrugged as the two began a walk across campus. She had tried to convince him of this before. He could just never really believe it. Whenever he tried to be funny or charming, it seemed to fall flat. No one laughed at his jokes and he could see people lose interest whenever he tried to engage them in conversation. Only Mary Jane really seemed to believe Peter was funny.

She may have had a point. After all, Spider-Man was funny. When he was swinging through the streets and coming up with banter on the fly he often got laughs from crowds. Spider-Man probably would have made everyone laugh AND make Schustrap look like a fool, but not Peter Parker. Peter Parker always choked. 

“So are you in the drama department?” asked Peter.

“Sure am!” smiled Mary Jane back, “Theater Performing Arts Major. What about you? Still bio?”

“Still bio.”

“You still doing your photography?”

“Yeah actually,” chuckled Peter, “I work part time at the Daily Bugle.”

_Of course she asked about the photography,_ thought Peter happily to himself.

It was one of their favorite things to do together back in the day. They’d sneak off into a forest preserve or secluded park and do lengthy photoshoots. Sometimes they were for headshots Mary Jane could use at auditions, but other times it was just for fun. They even made costumes entirely for the shoots. In fact, that was how Peter learned the skills he used to make his Spider-Man costume years later.

“No way,” said Mary Jane in disbelief, “On top of a full time college schedule?”

“Yeah.”

“Wow Peter,” she said, “I mean that’s amazing, you totally deserve it, but isn’t that a lot to handle? Aren’t you overworked?”

“You have no idea,” he said, before looking up, “Oh, this is my dorm.”

“The honors dorm,” noted Mary Jane, “You really are one hardworking nerd.”

“Thanks.”

“I mean that with love, Pete.”

“I know.”

“Anyway,” sighed Mary Jane, “It was great seeing you. I really liked talking.”

“Yeah, me too.”

“I’d like to find a time to really catch up with you,” she continued, “It’s been so long.”

“It really has.”

“Are you free for dinner tomorrow?”

“What?”

“I was thinking that Korean place on 6th. Let’s say 7:00?”

“Yeah,” nodded Peter immediately, “Yeah, I can do that.”

“Great,” she smiled, turning away, “Then it’s a date.”

_Date?_

Peter’s heart leapt.

***

Peter knocked on the door.

“It’s unlocked,” shouted Jessica’s voice from inside.

Peter turned the knob, pushed open the door, and immediately gasped. For a split second he thought he had seen Jessica without a shirt. Panicking, Peter slammed the door back shut.

“I am so sorry!!” he cried out in embarrassment.

“What?”

“I didn’t-” stuttered Peter, “I didn’t know! When said it was unlocked I assumed it was fine to-”

“It is,” said Jessica, “Come in.”

Peter opened the door again. He HAD seen Jessica without her shirt! She was standing in her kitchen wearing nothing but a loose pair of pajama pants, placing dishware in cabinets. Peter turned bright red at the sight of her boobs, let out an awkward yelp, and slammed the door back shut.

“Oh, right,” he heard Jessica mutter from inside, “One second, I’ll throw on a shirt.”

Peter sucked on his lips anxiously as he tried to clear what he had just seen out of his head. He was extremely uncomfortable seeing anyone naked, but especially Jessica. After everything she had done for him and shared with him, it felt incredibly dirty. He was mortified at the thought of having violated her privacy, even if she didn’t seem to consider it a big deal.

“Come in, I’m decent now.”

Peter opened the door slowly this time.

“Sorry about that,” said Jessica, now wearing a black T-shirt, “I had just showered. Wasn’t even thinking about it. What’s up?”

“I, uh…” began Peter, still actively trying to forget what he had just done, “I wanted to ask your advice on something.”

“Shoot.”

“Have I ever told you about my relationship to Mary Jane?”

Jessica raised an eyebrow.

“My friend,” said Peter, “Not the drug.”

“You haven’t.”

“Well…”

Peter told the whole story. From how he grew up with Mary Jane, to how he almost asked her out in high school, how they had lost touch, and everything that had just happened on campus the day before. Jessica listened dutifully, although did get up to mix a drink halfway through the story.

“Here’s to you, kid,” she smiled, raising the glass as Peter finished the story.

“What for?”

“Finally getting your lucky break,” she said, “I guess all that misfortune had to rebound somehow.”

“Oh, no,” said Peter, “She wouldn’t want to be with me.”

“I thought she asked you on a date?”

“I mean yeah,” shrugged Peter, “but like, as friends.”

“Did she say that?”

“No…”

“Does she normally go on dates with friends?”

“I guess not...”

Jessica smirked and finished her drink, walking into the kitchen to refill it.

“The universe is handing you a win here, kid,” she said, “You’d be an idiot not to take it.”

“You really think so?”

“Yes.”

Peter smiled. He felt himself blush.

“Oh,” realized Jessica, “While you’re here…”

She walked back over to her folding table and sat there, clicking away at her computer.

“I’ve got a lead on that Mysterio guy,” she said.

Peter grimaced. The emotional whiplash of going from thoughts of Mary Jane to thoughts of Mysterio was sharp.

“Did you hear about the special effects equipment they found at the bank?” asked Jessica.

“Yeah,” nodded Peter.

“Someone leaked the model numbers. I did some digging,” she explained, turning the laptop to face Peter, “They’re all products by this distributor.”

Peter looked at the screen. The site advertised the distribution of numerous kinds of equipment including pyrotechnic devices, fog machines, and even a finger-mounted gas chamber. The company was called “Sleight or Flight.”

“They’re for use in magic shows,” Peter realized.

“Yup,” said Jessica, “and even if Mysterio bought these products, that wouldn’t necessarily give him the ability to disappear out of the bank like that.”

“He’s a stage magician.”

“Or at the very least trained by one. Here’s another interesting tidbit: I called the distributor. Their only real clients are special effects houses.”

“How much crossover is there between special effects artists and magicians?”

“Some,” said Jessica, “but only who lives here and hasn’t performed lately. His name is Quentin Beck.”

“Damn,” whisteled Peter, “You really are good.”

“Yes I am,” said Jessica, “Although I don’t know how much this will help you. He vanished off the internet about a year ago and I couldn’t find any family or anything.

“But now we know he doesn’t have any superpowers,” said Peter, “He just uses special effects.”

“Exactly.”

“Thanks, Jessica!” chimed Peter, “You’re the best!”

“Thank me by paying the bill,” she said, “I charge by the hour.”

“Oh,” realized Peter, “I don’t know if I can afford-”

“I’ll put it on your tab. You can pay me later.”

“Wait, I have a tab? How much is on the-”

“Don’t you have a date to get ready for?”

“Right!”

Jessica scoffed as Peter rushed out the door. She thought for a moment. Then she returned her attention to her laptop.

“Mary Jane Watson…” she muttered to herself, typing the name into the search bar.

***

“That was nice,” said Mary Jane quietly.

“Yeah,” agreed Peter, “It was.”

Peter took a deep breath of the cool evening air. His heart was positively hammering now. He had spent the whole night agonizing over whether the date was meant to be romantic or not, and he STILL hadn’t figured it out. The dinner was a wonderful walk down memory lane, but he hadn’t mustered the courage to tell Mary Jane how he felt. Not even for the entire duration of the walk to campus, which was now nearing its end.

In any case, he felt as though he had screwed up. Trying not to come off as presumptuous, he had opted to only slightly dress up. He had kept his baggy jeans, but exchanged his usual hoodie and sneakers for a white button down and black dress shoes. Next to Mary Jane he looked like a slob. She had worn a form-fitting green pantsuit complete with a matching bowtie. It was a bold look to be sure, but damn did she look good in it.

By now they had reached campus. They were passing through a quiet, shady corner of the quad when their walk slowed to a stand. Peter realized the walk was coming to an end and that he had to say something. He looked at her, but the words caught in his throat before he could speak. Mary Jane smiled uncomfortably.

“I still can’t believe Flash and Liz broke up,” she said suddenly, “Back in high school it seemed like they’d get married for sure.”

“Yeah.”

“So did you ask her out?”

“Excuse me??” Peter asked, suddenly flustered as his heart pounded away harder.

_Why would she ask that?_ he thought to himself nervously, _Is that her way of suggesting this wasn’t romantic, or is she trying to make the topic about romance? Oh God, why can’t I just bring myself to tell her!?_

“Back in high school you had a crush on her, didn’t you?” she asked, “You were all bummed out when she started dating Flash.”

“Yeah,” said Peter, remembering how much he had confided in Mary Jane over the years, “Yeah I did ask her out, actually.”

“And?”

“Actually she said no before I could even finish the question,” said Peter, chuckling nervously.

“She didn’t!” gasped Mary Jane.

“She did,” said Peter, still chuckling.

Mary Jane started to giggle herself.

“Oh my God, what a bitch!” she yelled out with a slight smile.

They both burst out laughing. Peter couldn’t quite explain it, but something about the enormity of his romantic failure coupled with Mary Jane taking his side seemed ridiculously fitting. Mary Jane keeled over laughing, grabbing Peter’s arm for support. He reached over and gently placed his hand on her shoulder, still laughing himself. She looked up right into him, face full of joy. Slowly their laughter faded and they found themselves just smiling and staring into each other’s eyes.

“MJ…” Peter began softly.

“PARKER!!!”

“Oh God no,” whispered Mary Jane.

“Flash,” said Peter quietly, “Hi.”

“Mary Jane Watson!” shouted Flash happily, throwing his arms in the air, “No one told me you were back in my neck of the woods!”

“Hi Flash,” said Mary Jane, sounding about as excited as Peter.

“Leave it to you to keep looking fine even in men’s clothes!” said Flash, gesturing at her suit.

“Thanks.”

“So you finally decided to give up on that acting thing and go to school, huh?” concluded Flash.

“Actually I’m still doing theater.”

“Oh, I guess that’s cool too.”

By now Flash had physically inserted himself between Mary Jane and Peter, walling Peter off from them with his enormous back.

“You know I’m still playing football,” he said proudly.

“Really?” said Mary Jane with weakly feigned enthusiasm, “That’s great.”

“Yeah, it’s not all sunshine and roses though,” said Flash, puffing out his chest and placing his hands on his hips, “Liz and I broke up, you know.”

“I heard.”

“Yeah it’s been pretty rough,” continued Flash, “but the good news is: Flash is back on the market!”

“Good for you,” said Mary Jane.

“Oh it’s not good for me,” said Flash, “It’s good for all the single young ladies out there. Oh! How selfish of me. I’ve been talking all about myself. How about you? How have you been? You seeing anyone?”

“Flash,” said Mary Jane sternly, “Peter and I were having a private conversation.”

“Oh that’s right!” grinned Flash as he turned to Peter, “You two go way back, don’t you?”

Flash threw his arm around Peter’s head and clenched it into a tight headlock, pressing Peter’s face painfully into his forearm. Peter winced and grunted as Flash proceeded to press his knuckles into Peter’s head in a painful noogie.

“I haven’t seen you two together in years,” joked Flash, “I thought for sure you had moved on from this loser, Mary Jane!”

“Flash!” shouted Mary Jane angrily.

“Geeheeheehee!”

_You’ve got to be kidding me…_ thought Peter.

Everyone on the quad turned to the center of the quad, where a whirl of fog was forming around the center post. The heaviest fog accumulated at the top before erupting in a green and purple burst. Mysterio emerged from the burst atop the pillar of fog that had formed.

“Greetings student body of Empire State University!” announced Mysterio, his voice echoing across campus, “You are now under the control of the great Mysterio!”

_Now !? Really!?!_ cursed Peter silently.

He had to do something. This personal business with Mary Jane could wait. Mysterio had to be stopped now before he hurt anyone. He needed an excuse to leave and change into his suit.

“I’m going to go get help!” shouted Peter as he ran off.

“What did he say!?” Mary Jane asked Flash, having been distracted by Mysterio, “Where is he going?”

“I couldn’t hear him,” lied Flash, “All I know is he ran away like a coward. Come on, let’s find somewhere safe.”

“Your school shall turn over $1 million to me” ordered Mysterio, “Or else you will suffer my wrath!”

Mysterio threw his arms into the air as pillars of flame erupted from the tops of the various buildings around campus in a spectacular display. Then he clenched his fist as a ring of fire burst from the base of his fog pillar, sending a number of students running scared.

“Geeheeheeheehee!” he cackled, continuing his lightshow, “Yes! Cower before me, mortals!”

“Alright Beck,” called out Spider-Man loudly, “Enough with the light show!”

Everyone gasped as they turned and saw the famous web slinger standing atop Worthington Hall, the tallest building on campus.

“Who is this Beck? I am the great Mysterio!”

“It’s really sad that you consider that an improvement.”

Students around the campus chuckled. Mysterio clenched his fists in anger.

“Come for a rematch, have we!?” teased Mysterio confidently, “Well, then perhaps this time I’ll have to make your lesson a little more PERMANENT!”

Mysterio threw his arms in the air again. Flames roared from the top of every building on campus… Except for Worthington Hall. Spider-Man stood there casually while miming filing his nails. Worthington Hall was the only building not actively emitting flames.

“What is the meaning of this!?” demanded Mysterio.

“Oh no, Beck!” mocked Spider-Man, “Did someone break one of your toys?”

“You… You… You…” grumbled Mysterio, voice still echoing across campus, “You insufferable insect!!!”

Spider-Man leapt at him. Mysterio readied one of his tricks to defend himself, but Spider-Man was faster than him. Spider-Man also had another advantage: this time, he didn’t hesitate. Glass shattered as Spider-Man’s fist pounded Mysterio in the head on his way past him. The fog and flames faded away as Mysterio’s body fell to the ground and hit it hard, causing sparks to emit all over the devices in his costume. His face was visible now, inside a partially broken glass orb. He lay motionless, completely unconscious.

“And for your information,” said Spider-Man, landing gracefully beside him, “Spiders are arachnids, not insects.”

Spider-Man gave a playful salute to the students that had gathered to watch the confrontation. Then he leapt away and swung off, leaving everyone in shock as security rushed to apprehend Mysterio before he woke up.

“Spider-Man…” whispered Mary Jane, “He saved us…”

“Whoa…” whispered Flash, “So cool…”

***

Peter sat nervously on the side of his dorm bed, bouncing his knee up and down. He checked his phone again and again. He had asked Mary Jane to visit so they could talk. She had agreed and said she was on her way, but that was nearly 20 minutes ago. She hadn’t texted since.

There was a knock at the door. Peter nearly gasped as he steadied himself. For all the fights Spider-Man had been in, Peter genuinely felt like he had never been this nervous before. He had decided, though. He was going through with it.

“Hi,” he greeted anxiously as he opened the door.

“Hi,” she said back, “You okay?”

“Yeah,” he nodded as she walked in, “You?”

“Still a bit shaken up,” she admitted, before pointedly adding, “So where did you go last night?”

“You get right to the point, huh?”

“I want to know.”

“MJ,” began Peter, taking a deep breath, “I screwed up. You’re my best friend, but I’ve been keeping things from you and that’s no okay. First of all…”

_Might as well get the rough bit out of the way now…_

“I’m in love with you.”

“What!?”

“I’m sorry if that makes you uncomfortable,” he continued, “I don’t know for sure when it started. Whether it was high school or when I ran into you on campus or what. I don’t expect anything from you, not after how I’ve treated you. So whatever you decide to do with that information... I just thought deserved to know.”

“Peter...” she said quietly, “I… I don’t know how to respond.”

“That’s okay.”

“I mean I knew you liked me,” she said, “But this is… This is a lot at once, Peter.”

“I know.”

“Well,” she shrugged, “I mean I do kind of have a crush on you…”

“Really!?” exclaimed Peter, half delighted and half confused.

“Peter… I asked you to homecoming, like, our freshman year.”

“I thought you just felt sorry for me.”

“Aw, Tiger,” said Mary Jane, tilting her head and smiling, “No, I was actually really looking forward to it.”

“I… Really?”

“Yeah,” she said, “But you seemed so unhappy the whole time I figured you didn’t think of me that way.”

“I just really thought you had just brought me out of pity…” muttered Peter, “I had no idea you…”

“But I’m not in love with you,” she concluded, “and after last night I am definitely concerned.”

“You have every right to be.”

“I know,” said Mary Jane, “Now tell me where you ran off to.”

“Um,” began Peter, “Okay, this is going to sound unbelievable.”

“Try me.”

“Okay,” he said, taking a moment to ready himself for the response, “I’m Spider-Man.”

“...oh my God...” whispered Mary Jane after a moment.

“I…” said Peter nervously, “I’m going to show you. Are you ready?”

Mary Jane silently nodded. Peter steadied himself in the middle of the room. He hopped up into the air, spun around and latched onto the ceiling. Mary Jane let out a shrill gasp as Peter stood upside down, slowly waving his hands.

“Tada…!” he said quietly.

Mary Jane still didn’t respond. She just sat there, hands over her mouth, eyes slowly tearing up. Peter jumped back down to the ground and immediately crouched by her side, trying to get a look at her face and find out what was wrong.

“MJ, is everything-?”

“I’m fine,” she sobbed, smiling at him, “It’s… One second.”

She took a moment to compose herself.

“Some part of me thought you might be,” she said, “but not a part I really believed. After high school ended and I stopped seeing you and Spider-Man showed up in the news… He always reminded me of you: helping people out, making them laugh. Then last night, when you disappeared and Spider-Man showed up… For a moment I hoped that it was you, coming to save us. It was nice to think you hadn’t just run away. But I thought I was being too idealistic, so I dismissed that thought. But now you’re telling me… That you really… Wow… Peter...?”

“Yeah?”

She grabbed him by the collar, pulled him onto the bed with her, and kissed him hard.

***

_Ping!_

Mary Jane sighed in delight as she checked her phone, chuckled, and sent a text.

_Ping!_

She looked at the picture Peter had sent her. She let out a snort of laughter.

Mary Jane lay on her stomach on her bunk, kicking her feet in the air. She had gotten back from her dance class earlier and was still wearing her black leotard and navy blue yoga pants She had been there texting Peter for over an hour straight. It was a relief to be sharing laughs with him again. 

There was a knock at the door. Mary Jane, not expecting company, approached the door with curiosity and peered out the peephole.

“Who is it?” she asked the woman on the other side.

“Madeline Campbell, Jewel Investigations,” lied Jessica, “Can I speak to you for a moment?”

“Sure thing!” said Mary Jane, opening the door, “How can I help you?”

“Wow! Okay,” scoffed Jessica, forcing her way over the threshold and shutting the door “Listen up, Red: first rule of dating Spider-Man? Don’t let someone into your home just because they have a name and a bogus excuse.”

“Um… Wait…” thought Mary Jane aloud, “How did you know-”

“Peter told me about the other night,” said Jessica.

“Wait… Are you…? Jessica Jones?”

“Yeah,” she said, “Your boyfriend and I work together.”

“Okay,” said Mary Jane anxiously, “I’m going to have to ask you to leave…”

“Not happening.”

“Okay,” said Mary Jane as she walked past Jessica, “I guess I’ll just go let campus security know- OOP!”

Jessica had grabbed the back of Mary Jane’s leotard as she walked by and lifted her clear off the ground, hooking her to the corner of the bunk bed. Mary Jane winced in discomfort as she dangled there with her leotard digging into her shoulders and crotch. 

“Mary Jane Watson,” announced Jessica Jones, pulling out a small notepad, “Born in raised in Queens by a single mother along with her sister, Gayle. Absentee father. You graduated high school with a 2.9 GPA. You had two relationships in high school. They both broke up with you. You auditioned for the Williams Scholarship twice and were rejected twice. Instead of college you did part time work while auditioning for almost 100 different roles and scholarships. All of them rejected you too. You finally got the Williamson Scholarship on your third try, enrolled at ESU, started dating Spider-Man, and here we are.”

Mary Jane curled up in the air from discomfort as Jessica laid her life out before her, particularly the attention to her failures and shortcomings. Curling proved to be a mistake, as it only allowed the leotard to crawl farther up Mary Jane’s butt and pull her underwear up with it.

“What do you want?” she asked.

“Peter’s in love with you,” said Jessica, “and he’s trusted you very, very dearly because of that.”

“I know.”

“Now if you break up with him that’s one thing. You’re adults, it happens. But that trust he has in you is something special.”

“I know.”

“So I came here to tell you that if you EVER betray that trust,” continued Jessica intensely, staring her down, “Nothing will stop me from tracking you down wherever you go and making your life a living hell. Is that understood?”

“I would never-”

“A living hell,” repeated Jessica emphatically, “Is. That. Understood?”

“Yes!”

“Good,” said Jessica.

Jessica casually unhooked the leotard, letting Mary Jane fall to the floor. Mary Jane grunted as she got up, tugging at the wedgie she had sustained.

“This conversation never happened,” said Jessica, leaving without looking back.

_That is one scary lady,_ thought Mary Jane, _But if she really has Peter’s back, he’s a lot safer than I thought._

***

Quentin Beck kept his head held high as the guards led him down the prison hallway in his standard issue orange jumpsuit. He ignored the angry mockery of the various prisoners that bombarded him as they walked. He was above all of this and soon he would find a way out. For now, the best he could do was take his imprisonment with dignity.

“Hey look! It’s the great green dildo!”

“That’s not even clever!” shouted Quentin back, before the guards tightened their grip on him and pushed him on further down the hall.

Finally he was led into his cell. He stared at the guard with loathing as he was locked inside. Quentin offered his cuffs to be undone, which they did. As they left he lowered himself to the bed and closed his eyes, taking a moment to think.

“So you’re the GREAT Mysterio, huh?” grunted his cellmate.

“If you intend to belittle me, don’t bother,” sighed Quentin, “You cannot imagine the humiliation I have already endured.”

“Oh,” said the cellmate, “I think I understand humiliation _quite_ well. The name is Herman. Herman Schulz.”

**Author's Note:**

> I know it's not exactly an original ship, but God I help me I really wanted to write Peter treating MJ right for ONCE


End file.
